GOT WISDOM?

Dec 10

520. THAT SONG WAS NOT WRITTEN ABOUT YOU.

519. PAY YOUR BILLS ON TIME. UNLESS YOU ENJOY BEING SUFFOCATED BY REACTIVATION AND LATE FEES, IN WHICH CASE DON'T EVEN BOTHER LISTENING TO US.

Dec 09

518. YOU ARE NOT YOUR PARENTS.

517. BILL GATES IS GHENGIS KHAN WITH A PROGRAMMING DEGREE

516. IF I AM NOT YOUR "SON," DO NOT REFER TO ME AS SUCH IN CONVERSATION.

515. LAUGHTER ISN'T THE BEST MEDICINE WHEN YOU HAVE HAD AN ALLERGIC REACTION. I'D SUGGEST AN EPI-PEN.

514. IF THAT ONE SENTENCE REALLY WAS THE "STORY OF YOUR LIFE," YOU NEED TO GET OUT MORE.

513. GOOGLE WAVE IS NOT A NEW DANCE.

513. SETTING YOUR ALARM CLOCK TO GO OFF EARLIER AND THEN PRESSING THE SNOOZE BUTTON FOR A FEW HOURS ACCOMPLISHES NOTHING AND MAY END UP PUTTING YOU IN A WORSE POSITION THAN BEFORE YOU SET IT BACK.

512. MY MOTHER IS A SAINT AND IS NOT TO BE TAKEN INTO OUR PETTY DISAGREEMENTS.